


broken smiles (and tears running for miles)

by iamalystark



Series: the world is collapsing (exploding like a star) [4]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Dead Peter Parker, Good Friend Ned Leeds, Heavy Angst, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I'm Sorry, Ned Leeds Needs a Hug, Peter Parker Angst, Peter Parker Whump, Sad Ending, The Author Regrets Everything, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, Why Did I Write This?, Worried Ned Leeds
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-03
Updated: 2020-05-03
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:15:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 838
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23978821
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iamalystark/pseuds/iamalystark
Summary: Ned couldn't breathe, he realized. He was wheezing, gasping for breath as he cried, his chest coiled tight in hurt.(Or, Peter's death in the eyes of his best friend.)
Relationships: Ned Leeds & Peter Parker
Series: the world is collapsing (exploding like a star) [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1644184
Comments: 7
Kudos: 68





	broken smiles (and tears running for miles)

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this at 12am crying my eyes out, i seriously am so sorry this really hurt to write why do i do these things

When they were both seven years old, Ned and Peter had made a pact. They had been sitting in May and Ben's living room, laying on their stomachs as they built little structures with Legos.

"Are they best friends?" Peter had asked, his legs swinging back and forth in the air.

"Huh?" The Filipino boy questioned, his eyes flicking up from the miniture Stark Tower he was constructing.

"Your Momma and May. They laugh and talk all the time. They must be best friends." Peter had clarified, not looking up from the small bricks in his hands.

"I guess so. Do you wanna be best friends?" Ned suggested.

"Yeah! That would be so cool! Even when we're super duper old like Aunt May and Uncle Ben, we'd be the bestest of friends." The chocolate eyed boy had said, a wide smile on his face as he looked to Ned.

"Even older! Like my Nonna!" Ned shot back, giggling.

Peter grinned, a hint of baby fat lingering on his cheeks. "Yeah! Till the end of forever!"

"We have to have a secret handshake! May and Momma probably have one!"

That had been the start of a beautiful friendship, one filled with laughter and nerdy references, and secret handshakes, and inside jokes that every pair of best friends had to have.

It had also been a friendship filled with secrets, filled with lies. But that didn't matter. They'd always forgive each other for dumb things, always had.

The one thing Ned would never forgive, though, would be all the stupid things Peter convinced him to do. Maybe, if he hadn't let Peter make him take the tracker out, maybe if he'd just been a bit more stubborn, maybe. . .

Waking up to dozens of calls from MJ and May Parker had been the first and only sign he'd needed to know something was wrong. And it had to do with Peter Parker.

It had to do with his best friend. He opened MJ's messages, focusing on the single message she'd sent.

_Turn on the news._

Every single channel was saying the exact same thing. Spider-Man was dead, and Tony Stark was seen carrying his body away.

He hadn't cried at first, hadn't even moved. He'd just sat there, frozen. Because, this was wrong, right? This couldn't be true, right?

It was Peter. It was _Peter_. Peter didn't die. He couldn't. The one person that he had always imagined to be invincible was his best friend.

He was a superhero for crying out loud. Superheroes didn't just die. Peter Parker didn't just _die_.

But when Ned finally unfroze, and he finally looked back to his phone, he saw the missed calls from May Parker. Why else would May call him? Why?

She too, had sent only one message. Two words, two words that had managed to shatter his whole world.

_He's gone._

And that's when he finally cried. He dropped his phone beside him, blurring eyes locked on the TV, on the frozen image of Tony Stark's tear streaked face, of Iron Man himself holding his best friend's body.

His best friend. The sobs came then, loud and ugly as he gasped for breath. There wouldn't be anymore Lego sets, anymore late night Star Wars binging, nor would there be their secret handshake. Ned wouldn't be the guy in the chair anymore.

He wouldn't get to ask about Spider-Man, wouldn't get to nerd out over his friend knowing the Tony Stark.

He wouldn't get him back. He was gone. Peter Parker was gone. He was dead.

No more awkward laughs when he was avoiding something, no more of his nervous rambling, no more of anything.

Ned couldn't breathe, he realized. He was wheezing, gasping for breath as he cried, his chest coiled tight in hurt.

It was then that his bedroom door opened, a concerned Mrs. Leeds standing there, eyes wide.

"Baby, Ned, what's wrong? Talk to me." She pleaded, dropping to her knees at his side. Her hand was rubbing circles on his back, her face contorted in alarm.

She eyed the screen, the TV that Ned couldn't make himself tear his eyes off of, and she saw that her son's favorite hero was gone.

It was sad, but it wasn't something that would hurt him like this. " _Talk to me."_ She begged yet again.

Ned finally looked to his mother, his eyes swimming with tears as he sobbed and gasped.

"It's Peter." He wheezed, shaking. "It's _Peter_!"

And she understood. She got it. So she held her boy, she held him and his cries didn't stop, not for a long time.

"It's Peter. Peter." Ned wailed, arms wrapped around his mom.

The boy still couldn't breathe. " _Peter_."

He hated him. In that moment, Ned hated Peter Parker. Because he was a liar. He had promised. Till the end of forever, they were going to be best friends.

This wasn't forever. This was too soon. This wasn't fair. It wasn't fair.

Peter Parker was gone, and it was all his fault.


End file.
